okay, hold up. i have been so upset about this. do you see this young man? his name is suraj sharma and he deserves a goddamn nomination if not being handed the fucking oscar for life of pi, okay. here’s why:

1. this fucker had never acted before. he only was at the auditions because his brother was auditioning and he BRIBED him to come for A MOTHERFUCKING SUBWAY SANDWICH.

2. i don’t know if you know this, but there was NO tiger in any damn scene when he is on that damn boat. HE IS LOOKING AT AIR AND I BELIEVED THERE WAS A FUCKING TIGER IN THE MOVIE UNTIL AFTER I WATCHED AN INTERVIEW WHERE HE SAYS THERE’S NO DAMN TIGER. HE WAS SUCH A GOOD ACTOR I THOUGHT THERE WAS AN ACTUAL TIGER.

3. HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO SWIM. look, this kid lied about being able to stay afloat, but HE LEARNED AT LIKE 18 TO SWIM FOR THIS MOVIE. HIS PART IN THE MOVIE IS SURROUNDED BY WATER. MAN, I’VE BEEN SWIMMING SINCE I WAS TWO AND I WOULD STILL BE DYING IF I WAS DOING HALF THE SHIT HE PUT UP WITH IN THAT WATER. HE COULDN’T SWIM. LIKE WATER WAS CONSTANTLY DROWNING HIM. I WOULDN’T BE SURPRISED IF HE NEVER GOES NEAR THE WATER AGAIN AFTER THE AMOUNT OF TIME HE WAS ALMOST DROWNED.

4. if this is not enough to convince you, also look how cute he is and keep in mind that he NEVER GOT THAT FUCKING SUBWAY SANDWICH.

thank you for your time and if you haven’t seen the movie, go see it because it is amazing and i am very passionate about it as you can see.